How to survive infidelity and betrayal? Probably, you may have already said to yourself: “If my partner cheated on me, for sure, I would leave him/her. However, when this happens, the decision is far from that simple, especially when children are involved. There are several reasons why a woman cheats her husband. Again, there are seasons also why a man cheats his wife.
Finding out that our spouse has cheated on us hurts very badly. It is generally seen as the worst Betrayal (even more so if it is a sister or a friend), and it can also be experienced as abandonment. Besides, it is an injury that directly affects self-esteem. And that’s what makes rebuilding so grim and uncompromising. Not only is the couple broken, but the cheated woman/man is also. That is why it is tough to cope-up infidelity.
Survive Infidelity And Betrayal Challenges
Here are the challenges that wait for you if you choose to stay and some tips for tackling them to survive infidelity. Yes, following these tips, you will be able to cope-up infidelity.
Broken Trust
Fidelity and trust are two essential values at the base of most couple relationships. Once lost, that confidence will be challenging to regain. It will be a significant challenge if you choose to stay, and your partner will need to be extremely patient and accommodating to cope-up infidelity.
To feel safe in a relationship again, you will need your partner to adhere to specific rules. For example, you will surely demand that he cut all ties with this woman. If it’s a co-worker, you may need to request that he reports to you every contact with her.
These rules will help you feel like you are in control of the situation. However, never lose sight of the fact that this is just a comforting illusion. Broken trust must first and foremost be repaired inside you.
A Shared Responsibility
Frequently, infidelity is the result of a deeper relationship problem. Take the time to take stock of your relationship. Where your needs and those of your spouse genuinely being met? Did tensions exist within your relationship? The arrival of a child, for example, can upset every couple. However, sometimes, you may need to cope-up infidelity considering the newborn child.
What does your share of responsibility consist of in the crisis your couple is going through? If you want to get through it, you have to embrace it. Taking responsibility for yourself doesn’t mean you apologize for your spouse’s actions. On the other hand, it gives you back power in the face of the situation. You are no longer a victim. You are part of the problem and its solution. Thus, you may survive infidelity.
The Desire For Revenge
To cope-up infidelity is not an easy challenge. The pain you are experiencing is such that you may want your partner to feel it too. You think such because you want to take revenge. However, since you have decided to stay and your spouse’s repentance is sincere, this is certainly not an avenue to consider. Resist the urge to punish your spouse. After all, human beings are the best creature. Moreover, it is better to forgive than taking revenge.
Your hatred and your desire for revenge will then be transferred to “the other.” You will perceive the other as responsible for your misfortunes. Moreover, she is the main culprit! And it will haunt your thoughts day and night. You will have to work hard to silence those negative thoughts playing on a loop in your head.
At this point, you need to avoid putting your energy on “the other.” You have to refocus on yourself, on your reconstruction. You need to prioritize yourself and take care of yourself if you ever want to rebuild yourself. Taking revenge mentality will never give you peace to survive infidelity.
Shame And Fear Of Judgment
It is relatively rare to shout from the rooftops that we have been deceived. There is something shameful about being deceived. As if you weren’t good enough, beautiful enough, etc. There are also prejudices such as “If you had been able to satisfy your spouse, he would not have cheated on you,” etc. It is, therefore, expected that you have difficulty telling others about it. Still, I can only encourage you to do so. You don’t have to carry all this suffering on your own. Also, look for women to whom it has happened. Something is soothing about knowing that you are not alone.
Also, if you have decided to stay, you may be afraid of being judged as weak. After all, you have decided to pass the situation on the worst Betrayal. To help you cope with these emotions, I invite you to list the reasons that prompted you to give your relationship a second chance and re-read them often. Try to find out the good memories with your partner. Moreover, point out the positive qualities in your spouse. Then it will be easier for you to survive infidelity if you choose to forgive him/her.
The Injury To Self-Esteem
I was talking at the beginning of the article about an attack on self-esteem. You may have already demanded that your husband know every detail of his Betrayal: where, when, how, etc. The challenge here is to avoid comparing yourself to each other. You need to maintain your badly damaged self-esteem. Know the difference between a problematic situation in your relationship and your worth as a person. Your value as a worthy human being is not at stake. Thus, it is possible to cope-up infidelity.
To Survive Infidelity Betrayal, Permit Yourself To Be Happy As A Couple
In closing, you need to give yourself time to heal. However, the process will take a long time. Take care of yourself like never before. Additionally, it would help if you permitted yourself to be happily married again, despite being cheated. Experiencing happy moments together will be difficult at first because you will feel like you trivialize the fact that you have been tricked.
Stop seeing yourself as a loser and see yourself as a winner. Going through such an ordeal requires a lot of resilience, respect, courage, compassion towards oneself, humility, and strength. You can be proud of yourself. Right?
What To Do Before The Decision To Survive Infidelity Betrayal?
We have found many husbands and wives who suspect each other. You must be sure whether your spouse is cheating on you. Otherwise, with the wrong doubt of infidelity betrayal, you may suffer unnecessarily. So, you may ask how to become sure that your spouse is cheating on you? The best way to catch your cheating wife or husband red-handed by spying on their activities.
Spying on spouse activities is not a complicated task. Even you don’t need to hire a professional spy and spend huge money. So how to spy on your spouse to have proof that she/he is cheating on you? The easiest way is to monitor your spouse’s phone with a tracking app to catch the cheating partner. Yes, use the best Spyware to spy on your spouse’s activity.
Among many Spyware available in the market, Spouseware is the best one that we recommend. Buy now Spouseware and start monitoring your loved one’s phone without touching it and without a trace! Have a look at the unique and the best features about Spouseware: